What is it?...

I saw my mum being pushed into the op theatre...it's a common minor op, but I cant help feeling a lil sad. My dad looked tired and old, I don't remember seeing him sleeping last night. Acik said Abah was up all night...

Abah and Acik went back home to freshen up. I decided to take a stroll and get myself some much needed coffee at the mamak stall but ended up in a 24-hour cyber cafe. Surprisingly this place is almost packed considering the wee hour of the day it is now. I managed to check my e-mail and send some work back to the office...and write this post.

I have this really bad feeling at the pit of my stomach...and I've been feeling like this the last one week. I was assured the reason why I'm feeling all sinking was because of my mom and her op....but now I know its not. I'm not worried about Mama at all....its something else. My heart is heavy, I can't even breathe properly...I had panic attack a couple of times this week, my blood pressure is a lil low and I almost passed out in the meeting room...

The last time I was feeling this way was a week before I stumbled upon my ex bf in his full 'riding' moment in bed with a girl when he told me that he was in bed with fever.....or when I had that horrible accident on MRR2...or the time when I found out that my pet hamster Teh died of cancer....

My instinct is trying to tell me something....and I have a feeling that its going to cause much pain this time...

...what is it? What?.....