Monday, April 04, 2005

Change

When a tragedy/mishap/drama occured in a relationship, it changes the relationship. The change can be big or small, significant or otherwise...but it changes nonetheless. Some couple find themselves drifting far apart, and some find more of each other...

What happened the last couple of days have torn my heart and soul to pieces....I have been here before, I won't lie. I am a product of a woman who have survived numerous affairs (not of my own) and cheating partners...

What happened the last couple of days is somewhat too cliche and the pain is just too darn familiar. I mean, how else can you feel when you found out that your partner made an arrangement to cheat on you? Yes it didn't happened, but not because your partner changed his/her mind, but because he was confronted by you who happened to have all the e-mails as proof to a story of an affair that almost happened but didn't?

...*sighs*

Same 'ol same 'ol, no matter what and how the story goes....

Trust had been betrayed...pain had been inflicted...

So what now?...

Logic dictates : Run, run as fast and far as you can....while you still can. Fight..Scream...Cry....EXIT!

....instead, I stayed.

Perhaps I am an optimistic fool, or just plain stupid...perhaps I care about him that much to fight, scream, cry and leave things behind...pain lingers still...and trust has to be built again...it ain't easy I tell ya...but

I'm willing...logic(al) was never a word to describe love...I want to be able to say "I didn't give up, I tried my best...yes I did.."

Things happened for a reason they say...I'm still waiting for mine...